I said "please"

I do believe I said please when I asked for my bike lane on my commute. I do believe I have been very aware of traffic laws. I ride on the side of the road and on the commuter trail. I wear a helmet and don't weave in and out of traffic. I do not wear headphones, talk on the phone, or anything else that would make me oblivious to traffic. I wear bright colors when the sun is out and reflective clothing when it's dusk. I really and truly said "PLEASE" when I asked for my bike lane. So, WHY would you feel the need to crowd me on the road? WHY would you feel the need while sitting in traffic in your gas guzzling SUV by YOURSELF feel the need to pull your car as close to the gutter and curb as possible when you saw me coming up behind you? Why would you feel the need to act as if I am the offending person in traffic? How on EARTH could you do what you did without any remorse? I am neither a motorcycle nor a car trying to pass on the right illegally. I am neither a hindrance on the road nor am I going to keep you from sitting in more traffic. I am merely trying to get home just like YOU, except I'm on my bicycle on the side of the road. Again, I asked nicely and said "Please" when I asked for my bike lane. I made the choice to ride my bike to conserve energy, gas and take a car off the road. You chose to have an SUV. You chose to live a significant distance from your workplace. You chose to commute by yourself and not carpool. You knew the gas milage your vehicle got when you bought it. Even THEN it was irresponsible of you to buy a vehicle you were going to drive by yourself. You have no right to do what you did. Then again, I hope when the bicyclist behind me hit your SUV with his hand, led me through traffic ahead of you (and ultimately through the traffic light ahead of you), and then flicked you off as he rode by SCARED THE CRAP out of you. I know you couldn't see me for a moment or two after he hit the SUV with his hand. I know you were talking on your phone at the time. You see, I said please. Someone Somewhere heard me say please and sent the bicyclist right behind me. I'd wish horrible things on you but you've already done them to yourself.